Brian Cope

The following story was shared through an interview between Brian Cope & Friends of Ruby.

Brian grew up in a time when being gay was a psychiatric disorder, and until he was in his 20’s (1969) was a criminal offence. Brian is an individual who came out late in life, after he had shared a married life and fathered 2 children. He does a lot of work in Intergenerational programming and support, including addiction support. Instead of sharing advice, he would rather share his experience.

His goal is to share his light as much as possible: sharing his light means others can see it, benefit from it, and add to the fire by sharing their own selves and therefore keeping the light alive and growing.

There are 2 driving forces in life: Fear and Love

Fear is everything that holds us back. Before coming out, he was terrified about why he was dating girls but always watching boys. He was desperate to keep everyone around him happy and feared not meeting the expectations of everyone else

Fear is what keeps you in a swamp of shit, even though you can see the sparkling stream ahead.

Vulnerability is required for change. Being vulnerable and facing his fears were necessary for all the changes he has made in his life.

Love is all the positive choices you make.

Love is embracing yourself and others.

Love is understanding that you can change yourself and your experience in life by changing your perspective: your perspective is the only thing in your control.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

– Marianne Williamson